Absent "Father"

So…I definitely should be writing up my speech outline at the moment and not a blog. But I needed a break from the chaos I call life to just sit down, think, and write what is on my mind. I love my family and my friends. If it were not for them, I would have lost my mind by now. The whole working full time and being a full time student can get rather stressful and crazy. I love my job and am so ready for school to be over. I need a vacation. Winter break cannot come soon enough. Big changes are coming in my life and I am ready for those.  One of my favorite quotes is from Lane Frost, “Don't be afraid to go after what you want to do, and what you want to be. But don't be afraid to be willing to pay the price.” I am not afraid to go after what I want to do and what I want to be and I am willing to pay the price.  This speech that I should be working on is going to be rather difficult for me. My goal is to try to be as unbiased as I can be, but when it comes to absent “fathers” who don’t pay the child support they are ordered to by courts; I can be a little biased. I love my mom and (step)-dad for everything that they have done for me but I do not understand how, after everything that my mom went through and the amount of money she is owed by my biological father, they could let the man come around when we were younger. Had he paid what/when he was supposed to, had he shown up when he promised he would, I could kind of understand. But instead we lived paycheck to paycheck hoping for some money from the guy to put a decent meal on the table and he never showed up when he said he would. My mom had to lie to us and make up excuses for him. No mother should have to lie to her children for the sake of a man who has hurt her and her children in more ways than one. I absolutely love my mother for doing that and having the strength to welcome him in our home so he could have a relationship with us, his children. I understand today why she did that. I understand that because she did, I am able to see what it is he has done to us as a family and the way he has screwed us over by not doing what he was supposed to. The man is brilliant. He really could be living a really good life, paying the bills he’s supposed to pay and not owe as much as he does to my mom. Why he doesn’t use that college degree he has is beyond me. Instead he works as an auto mechanic with employers who know how to screw over the ex-wife and kids. The majority of the company is made up of these deadbeat dads that have found a way around the system. Why he does this confuses me like you have no idea. With the amount he owes to my mom, my sister, brother and I could finish college and not have to touch a loan. We may never see any of it. It is absolutely insane that a man could do this to his children. Wow, maybe I should have just done my outline instead of writing my thoughts about the loser who is just my absent “father” who doesn’t pay the child support he owes.